If anyone ever tells you you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don’t need that kind of negativity in your life.
Remember when we first moved in together? The piano filled up the living room. You played me boogie woogie, I played you love songs. You’d say we were playing house, now you still say we are.
posts like this make me sad because i truly don’t see how anyone would ever want this with me
how did I just play candy crush for three hours: an autobiography
so my sister found an old empty frame I had laying around
A possum broke into an Australian bakery and ate so many pastries it couldn’t move. This is how they found him.
it’s been ten years and i still think this is one of the best plot twists in history
sometimes i honestly wonder if killing myself would be better than putting up with all of this shit.
things i don’t understand: men objectifying women in the miss usa pageant as nothing more than “some fine pussy” (quoted directly from the guys at work) and simultaneously criticizing them for being stupid (as in miss utah’s response to the gender wage gap). like please stop pretending intelligence is something you value in a woman
dooooo me
Photo by:Pardeep Singh
it’s kinda funny how when you get older you start to enjoy the things you hated as a kid like taking naps and getting spanked
the second one was kind of unexpected
but no one is disagreeing
do me
Cosmo Tip 5437:
Secretly use super glue instead of lube so you can be together forever
